Mother, things are changing.
I know you’ve seen the chameleon Autumn leaves.
I know like most things I love, they’re thinking of leaving.
I’m watching the wind take them away like a child’s dream.
All that I am -is all that I am not.
All that I was -is still what they see.
I’ve got my vocal chords tied in a noose’s knot.
Maybe it’s time for me to make like a leaf.
Mother, I’m trying to face all the negativity.
People aren’t as educated on the matter at hand.
Dad hasn’t rescheduled therapy.
And I know I’m getting bad again.
People aren’t always people really.
This is one thing I have managed to learn.
They can be monsters and entities that possess your feelings.
Or the tenderness that somehow makes your throat burn.
I’m rambling, I know- but if I don’t let these emotions go
I know they’ll take over my body and drain me of my self-esteem
And that process is painfully slow
Not to mention, I can’t just fill myself back up with gasoline-
And expect that I can run on that alone.