Like all people must vanish in a second to allow their soul to fuel the sun-
Like all people must allow their heart’s African drum to slow down it’s beat until it’s done-
She followed this method of life, unknowing that her breathing
Would end before she could tell me goodbye.
I was thirteen when her death, a complete mystery, occurred.
One day we were laughing, the next I was watching men cover her with dirt.
You never expect your heroes to pass so soon.
But I manage to tell about her being the woman on the moon.
As a child, you always hear that you’ll sit upon clouds in heaven.
But you must understand my mother went beyond the best.
So I don’t see her singing with angels, but dancing around the rings of Saturn.
While wearing her favorite white dress.
She gives life to the galaxy, planting flowers and leaving astronauts speechless.
Every now and then she gazes at Earth, knowing she can’t return.
It pains her, looking at the blue snowglobe of memories- but the gravity affects her sadness.
It floats it away, so that she may be happy and dance without concern.
Me, however, things have been very dim and dull.
I watch people with their mothers now, and I just collapse into sorrow.
I never know if I’m going to have a good day without thoughts knocking around my skull.
And I’m terrified of watching everyone else just.. Go.
I’m going to be graduating this year. Do you know how proud she’d be?
She was the only one that cared, and wanted to motivate me.
She didn’t finish middle school. She wanted me to never give up.
But when she first passed, I felt I had lived enough.
There was no purpose. Every day hurt as much as the previous.
Healing was a myth that people tell to keep you marching in the burning sun.
I screamed for relief, I begged for empathy, and I sobbed into pillows.
But no one knew how to comfort, and no one offered me a hug.
On days, I felt the scent of her perfume linger in the air like smoke.
I’d inhale it, and never knew to sob or to smile.
Then when the night came, and the moon stared.
I wiped away my tears, and pictured my mother there.